art gallery

Put a big red tick on the wall next to the paintings you like and write “could do better” next to the ones you don’t.

Get a job as a gallery attendant, then tell the visitors that the paintings are interactive and that the artists want you to touch them.

Use spray and wipe to remove the smudges from the Monets.

Take a piss or shit in the middle of the gallery and claim it straight away as your Avant Guard Masterpiece.

Convince the other visitors that the elevators are installations, then convince them that the stairs and everything else is an installation.  Then tell them they are not allowed to touch the installations.  Stand back and enjoy.

Follow visitors on their gallery journey whilst chomping down on crispy crisps right behind them.

Tell everyone that the price is only a “suggested donation.”

Put a half eaten egg and tuna sandwich in you coat pocket just before handing it in to the coat check.

Start an alternative black market coat check.

Go around telling visitors that the work they are looking at is not finished yet.

Pash the statues.

Pick up a painting.  Yell very loudly, “THIS IS JUST A BUSINESS!” Smash the painting on the ground.